Anchor down and hold on

Someone recently told me adoption is not for the faint of heart.  How right they are.  I feel like I am being blown ever which way the wind blows.  I am normally a level headed person.  At least I like to think so.  This process has me on a roller coaster and we are just getting started.  At times I am ready to jump off.  My brain starts saying if it is this hard now what's in going to be like later on?  Are you sure this is your calling?  You know you really don't need another child.  You were completely happy before.

But then my heart thinks of my son all alone in an orphange facing being transferred to an insitution and how could I not.  It is so much easier to ignore the plight of orphans when you haven't seen their faces. But I have seen, I do know.  I can't turn away.  So no matter how rough this ride may become I am going to anchor down and hold on.

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and not lean on thine own understanding

Psalm 91:2 “I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.”

Hard day. . .

Today I feel all alone and defeated.  It has been one thing after another and we haven't even completed a homestudy.  Lord are you sure this is what we are suppose to be doing?  Today I am questioning that calling.  I feel like a fish floundering on dry land.  We have no family support system.  We have no encouragement, no help.  It is us and the Lord.  He is faithful and he has blessed the fundraisers we have held.  But everytime we have enough money for the next step something happens.

The truck messed up, my car brakes went out, the printer broke, and now I need to have a tooth pulled.  On and on and on it goes.  There are more things that I can't even recall.  I had being such a downer, I hate feeling this way.  Today I am asking for prayers, for words of encouragement, for support.

Spreading Awareness

Here are some links to other blogs having give aways and such.  Please take a moment to go and look.  Even the smallest donations add up. <3

Lost No More

According to His Glory

Still trucking

Things are going sooo slowly.  It is beyond frustrating.  Everytime I think we are going to move forward we get pushed two steps backwards. 

Our first online auction went very well.  We raised enough to cover our placing agency application fee and our donation to RR.  I was praying we would make enough this weekend at the craft show to cover our homestudy fees.  It didn't happen.  I went in the hole.  :(  Not a fun experience.

I am clinging to the Lord this week.  Trusting that he called us to do this so he will provide our needs.  It is so easy for me to focus on the bad and negative.  So easy for me to want to say I give up this is too hard.  I REFUSE to give up, I REFUSE to give in!!  This is my child, he is worth fighting for.

I ask for your prayers and support.  I ask for your help to keep me focused on the positives.

We are starting our Puzzle Fundraiser.  We have purchased a beautiful puzzle of all things Russian.  We are selling each piece for $10.  I will write your name on the back of the piece you purchase.  Once the puzzle is complete we are going to have it professionaly framed so both sides are visible.  This way our child will be able to see everyone who helped to bring him home.  If you are interested in purchasing a piece please let me know.

Trust and Obey

The last couple of weeks have been really rough for me.  I have been in a whirlwind trying to come up with ways to fund this adoption.  Trying to make things to sale.  Plus trying to keep up the kids school work and activities.  I was overwhelmed and stressed to the max.  Everytime I turned around something was going wrong and messing up.  I was becoming so frustrated and discouraged.

And then the Lord made me stop and realize there is NOTHING I can do to make this adoption happen.  NOTHING.  No amount of begging, pleading, sewing, selling.  NOTHING.  This is all in his hands. 

On one hand I have known this from the beginning.  We don't have the resources to make this happen.  I knew that from the start.  I trusted in the Lord to bring our child home.  I just wasn't trusting in his timing.  I thought I would just help him along the way.  I am a planner, I thought if I could just make a plan as to how to raise the funds it would work.  NOT.  Instead all I accomplished was making myself crazy.

So I am going to sit back and fully trust in the Lord.  I am going to wait for his timing though it may not be my own.

Ps 27:14 Wait for the LORD; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD.

Ps 33:20 Our soul waits for the LORD; He is our help and our shield.

Isa 40:31 Yet those who wait for the LORD will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary.